Author function: creative author
Abstract notion: anxiety
Once upon a time, there was a little girl
who was in a middle of a nice walk when, suddenly, a little monster appeared. The
monster did not do anything, so, the little girl thought that if she just
ignored it, it would eventually leave. But the little monster followed her all
the way home, made a nest under her bed, and refused to leave. It followed her
around every day, peeking out from cupboards or from under the sofa. At first,
the little girl did not know how to feel about the monster; it did not hurt her,
but it did not feel quite right to have it in her house anyhow. Finally, the
little girl decided to stay away from the sofa, the cupboards, and her bed,
just in case the monster, now not so little anymore, was hiding there, because
even the thought of it made her feel uneasy. Then, one day when the little girl
looked at herself in the mirror, she saw the monster in place of herself, and she understood that she was in fact the monster and that she would never
not be scared. So, from then on, the little girl lived unhappily ever after.
Reflection
I am not at all sure that my function as ‘creative
author’ is correct, but since simply author or writer would be too unspecific,
that is what I went with. My story breaks the ‘show don’t tell’ rule by telling
everything and showing very little, but I hope to have made up for that by
having the notion of anxiety represented as a living thing so not everything is
served straight up – even though I admit that it is very easy to figure out. If I had chosen the
author function of a poet, I could have made it more emotional by going more in depth with how anxiety makes you feel, think, and act, and by having the poet speaker directly address
the anxiety.
I actually liked that you chose creative author and then told a story that progressed in a steady flow. You are describing something that is horrifying, but by using terms such as "little girl" and "little monster" the formulation seems in contrast rather innocent. It thus creates a good balance.
ReplyDeleteThe personification of anxiety as a little monster is quite effective and works well within the fairy tale-like frame you've used. I think the main 'problem' with your text is that the monster could easily have had many other 'names', such as 'hate', etc.
ReplyDeleteThe reflection is fine. Maybe one could have exemplified the different ways in which the poet would have represented anxiety?